Monday, June 6, 2011

Most Stressful Experience EVER

When we were getting married I had heard that planning a wedding would put major stress on our relationship.  It didn't.  Things got frustrating at times but we never fought.  Having a baby- we heard what stress that would put on our new marriage.  We settled right in to being a family without any hardships.  So I really didn't expect buying a house to be as excrutiatingly horrible as I have heard. 

I figured we are realistic in what we are looking for and our budget (not like the property virgins on HGTV) and at the end of the day we are looking for a home.  A HOME.  Our own place.  For our growing family.  That alone would make things exciting and enjoyable, right?

NOT! It's been terrible.  Horrible!  We started our home search in a rush because my mom accepted an offer on the condo she had bought (it was a good idea at the time...dang real estate ups and downs) when Nate and I wanted to move off campus together.  We had 45 days to find a home and close before the closing on the condo left us homeless.  It was hard! We were all over the place.  Our low budget had us going where the prices were, as opposed to picking within a specific area we wanted to stay in.  I THOUGHT I wanted to live in the valley and did a lot of home searching out in Naugatuck.  It's a nice area...but driving out there made me sad to leave the convenience of the Greater New Haven Area.  Then we looked at several properties in Middletown.  Puts us closer to an equal distance between my family in NJ and his family in NH.  But it still took me away from where I really wanted to be/stay.  It didn't help that I fell in LOVE with a short sale that needed MAJOR work and wasn't giving up until we were able to see it.  It was the PERFECT location.  It would be our forever house, but it was way too much for us to take on.  Then we found an old home (love older homes!) that we put an offer on and went back and forth a little bit with the sellers.  Ultimately, they wanted more money than we could afford considering that, among other things, EVERY ONE of the 30 windows needed to be replaced and...we don't have that money!

Everything that looked promising to us turned out to be a short sale which we didn't have the time to deal with, or the money to fix up.  We had agreed to see a 2 br forclosure that had just been listed, even though with a new baby and frequent family visitors 3 br is much more ideal.  It was so tiny and I was so tired of the process I felt like we were wasting our time.  Then we went to the yard.  Nice.  May as well look at the's finished!  All of a sudden this house was saved.  I could see potential, Nate could almost.  We saw this house right before seeing the money pit house we had put an offer in on (which was HUUUUGE) and when we realized the buyer of that one wanted too much we decided to rethink the forclosure.  Turns out bids on the property were due within hours and there were already 3!  So my husband races to the realtors office to put in a bid on a house he wasn't 100% on.  Our bid was accepted! YAY!!!! Our closing would be scheduled for mid June and the condo's closing was the end of May, but we did it! We would figure out the temporary living situation.

We can eventually add a staircase and finish the attic to make bedrooms.  We can re-fininish the basement if we want to re-work the space.  Mabe add a dining room off the back of the kitchen since the yard is a good size (with a deck and sliding doors off it!).  Oh yeah, we just need to get in there and little by little the house can grow with us.
It has been nothing but problems, extensions and last minute rushes.  During the searching process Nate and I felt bad that we had our realtors driving all over the place and planned on a nice gift card for each of them when we finally finsihed our journey.  Well, we are nearing the finish line and our attitude has changed toward them dramatically!  I don't want anything to do with them and I'm afraid if I hear one of their whiny voices I may freak out on them.  Luckily now that we are past the searching phase and on the business phase Nate deals with them.

Oh and the rush to be out of the condo....Ha!  The buyer they brought in need extensions or whatnot and when were we told? O yeah..10 minutes after all of our furniture was put into storage because we had to be out of there!  Remember a previous post about living with family for a few weeks...where there are donkeys and a steer?  We were getting ready to head up there within 3-4 days and now that hasn't been necessary.  My 22 week pregnant ass has been living on an air mattress for weeks now.  I can tough it out.  The convenience of staying put was worth more to us. 

WELL! we are sooooo close to being done.  We have sorted out some issues and should still be good to close on friday on our house (still no word on the buyers for the condo, which until very recently we were pretty much banking on this sale for our own purchase!).  Our mortgage rep has said he sees no reason why we wouldn't close on Friday.  But the damn realtor keeps calling and texting my husband saying we need to sign an extension and there's no way we can close on Friday.  We will NOT go past Friday.  I am so beyond pissed at her.  I am sure she is trying to stall us while the condo is still up in the air because my mother has threatened walking away from the buyers who don't have their stuff together.

This has been the worst experience ever! Horrible!  Does anyone have an enjoyable experience buying a home?  Millionaires maybe.  Ugh this sucks! But hopefully it will all be done soon.  Very soon! I can start my nesting!  Can't wait to get into that nursery!


  1. Hey Lady! I'm having a problem posting comments so I'm hoping this will go through. :) (This is Cassie from The Real Housewife of Longleaf Ranch in case it won't post as me!) I used to own a title company so I've been through this process every which way! I'm available for any help if you want to email me. BTW - really sweet that you were thinking of getting the realtors a gift card for their trouble but if your laws are anything like ours they wouldn't be able to accept them anyway. Most importantly a Realtor is supposed to be your advocate - not your nemesis. You're the boss! Be polite but firm! They don't get paid unless you close. They should be doing whatever it takes to get you into your home. No matter what the condo sale looks like. Try not to stress much more. Take a deep breath. And email me if you need help. I'm more than happy to answer questions!

  2. wow!! I can only imagine the stress. We recently talked about putting out home on the market. I think we have decided to just add on to the might be less stressful...especially with 2 kids and 1 on the way.


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